I went to a writers/storytellers workshop tonight with Pandora. It was a great exercise. We were asked to write a story about a personal glory, gift or grace. We were given 15 minutes, in which time I wrote this episode. (It is rough, raw and totally unpolished…but what do you expect in 15 minutes.)

I present it to you with only a minor spell-check edit.
————-
Huck walked onto the tennis courts with her beat up second hand racket. She had never before played tennis, but she had been told her University didn’t have enough players for their own tournament. So when they approached the basketball team to provide warm bodies she gladly accepted. She liked being out in the sun and active, so it was the perfect Saturday opportunity. After a brief run-down of the rules and principles she took her place beside her doubles partner.

The truth was she still didn’t understand the scoring and most of the game was still a mystery. She danced about the court hopelessly flailing at the speeding green bullets. As they passed by her, Huck found herself swinging too late, too hard or not at all. But she was determined to do her best. Luckily her partner picked up the slack and Huck quickly learned how to stay out of the way. They lost two matches, but not too badly and were beginning their third and final before disqualification. Half way through the match Huck lurched for yet another passing missile and suddenly felt the familiar twist and agony as her ankle curled in upon itself. The pain was excruciating and took her breath away. Her partner was there in an instant to provide the much needed support to reach the bench. After a few moments of stretching and deep breaths she found her strength, rose off the bench and continued despite the pain. Huck could feel the tennis shoe tighten around her now swollen purple ankle. She hobbled her way through the rest of the match knowing the final outcome would most likely prove to be failure and disqualification.

Later as Huck lay in her dorm room with her leg elevated and iced she heard an unexpected knock on her door. Without rising she called to her guest to enter. As the door swung open Huck was astonished to see most of the tennis club standing before her presenting a large trophy. Had they won the meet? She was surprised as they handed the award to her, with the proud inscription “Sportsmanship Award.” They applauded her efforts and later Huck learned that all teams present had voted and she had won it.

There was no failure, only recognition in the face of her efforts. Huck had snatched victory from the jaws of defeat through her courage and tenacity.
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I guess after re-reading it myself, I found some life lessons in it:

1. You don’t have to know what you are doing; just showing up is effort enough
2. You will occassionally swing too late, too hard or not at all, throughout your life
3. Sometimes it’s best to just stay out of the way
4. Pain and injury are unavoidable, but don’t let that stop you
5. It’s nice to know you have a partner you can rely on to help you reach the bench when you can’t get there by yourself
6. Stretching yourself and breathing deeply are integral to finding your strength
7. Even when all things seem dire, continue to do your best
8. Don’t be afraid to invite the unexpected into your room
9. People will recognize your efforts and accomplishments in times when even you don’t
10. Failure is usually in your own mind; sometimes it looks like victory to those who are paying attention

My sidebar continues to grow as I introduce yet another new blogger, who is finding her voice. Please welcome 3D to the fold.

Click. Spark. Flame. The connections spread like ‘wilder-fire’. My paternal uncle and I have begun exchanging emails, and just today his daughter contacted me and sent pictures and a poem her friend wrote about her mother’s recent death. It was amazingly beautiful. Their family has been passing around my short story regarding my Grandmother’s passing. With each new heart it discovers, I find a new name with a familiar ring glowing in my inbox. The internet is truly a wondrous thing. My cousin spoke of pictures she had seen of me as a child and the mystery she always felt around them. It’s interesting to hear her describe so many of the same thoughts and feelings that I recall from my own youth. We shared a curiosity about these familiar faces from the photos and wondered how their life was different, what was the same? Did they wonder about me as well? The answer comes at last with a resounding: Yes! Now with gentle, tentative words and courteous introductions we begin to shed light on our lives and see for the first time the people who were for so long in the dark.

I look forward to each new encounter, but I realized I am feeling an old familiar pang that has truly been dead in me for a long time. Today, I recognized that tiny tingle of fear deep in my belly, as the gentle wind of my thoughts whispered “I’m gay, what if they reject me?” I feel the old fear of their reactions, the potential obstacle of religious beliefs or different views regarding my sexuality. I have for years now been very open, comfortable and honest about who I am. So, the memory of my first disclosures had been dormant, but I felt them again this morning as I looked at my cousin’s beautiful smiling face tucked neatly alongside her husband’s shoulder. It’s not like I expect to show up with a pink triangle tattoo, or anything. I do know how to be discrete and play the “social game”. But, I worry about putting myself out there and getting hurt. However, I am unwilling to let those fears hold me or bind me. So I will boldly walk forward into the ‘wilder-ness’ with my torch held high, and my best light shining forth. It just so happens that my light also comes with a little rainbow.

———–on a side note————
Only yesterday my psychic told me of the numerous new relationships that I would be developing over the next couple of months. And today my horoscope had this to say:
You’ll be doing lots of chatting for a couple of days — most of it to faraway loved ones. If you don’t have extra minutes or a good long-distance plan, better invest in one now. And there’s always email.

There are no coincidences, only Faith and action.

My psychic rocks! I just had a great session with her.
Look out world, here I come!

———-also———-
Daily (by Astrology.com)
Be ready to shake up your world. Once it happens, you will never be the same. Although the changes will be subtle and slight at first, what they will usher in promises to be a definite turn for the better. Don’t worry about what it is or when it will happen — just be aware that something great is just around the corner, and it’s waiting for you. Aren’t surprises lovely?

My mother just invited me to join her and my siblings on a short trip to Tennessee later in October to visit family. My parents separated when I was 5 and we moved to Montana. Primarily due to the miles, through the years we lost contact with most all of my Father’s family. Strangely enough one of my uncles and my mother just started to connect again. I know that it was very difficult for her when she lost contact with some of my Father’s siblings and their spouses. During the time my parents were together she had developed strong bonds with many of them. Trust me when I say I fully understand how that happens. As for me, I have always consciously chosen to keep or lose friendships and love relationships based on individual connections. Sometimes you learn things from your parents that they aren’t even trying to teach you. I know this trip will be very healing for my Mother. For that reason alone I would go.

But for me, I’m still processing how I feel about it. I guess I haven’t felt compelled to go, but I was open to the opportunity when it presented itself. My mother comes from a family of 8, and my Father, a family of 7. So I will be almost instantly doubling what is already a rather large family group. (Damn, I guess I’ll have to double my Xmas card order! LOL) I am curious to see what traits and resemblances I received from that blood-line. Will I recognize familiar ways of being and habits, not just features and appearances that we share through genetics and not learning/upbringing? I’ll have a unique opportunity to get a better look into my own answers regarding the age old nature vs. nurture debate. I’m sure I will have more ‘emotional bubblings’ as the time grows near, during the visit and especially afterwards, but right now the whole thing is still just in my head. Overall I trust it will be a very interesting episode. And it couldn’t come at a better time in my life.

There are no coincidences, only Faith and action.

You do crazy things for your family. Now typically i’m pretty naked around my own house, especially when I’m doing laundry. I like to get everything clean at once. Well, when you get an urgent text message from your brother that says he needs you, you figure out a way to work it out.

Here’s for you Fly! Let’s hope it works.

I’m wearing it all night. Go Skins!

I’m pleased to introduce Turtle and Pandora. (It’s about time your name showed up ‘in white’ on my site.)

Welcome to the wonderful world of blogging, ladies.

Their links are now available from my sidebar, so check ‘em out.

Ok, so maybe not 1,000…but here’s some great stuff from our fabulous camping extravaganza.

Sun, sun, sun…not a drop of rain
“Spike!”
Roller-coaster roads
Stoking the fire, with my air pump
Making the absolutely worst breakfast in the history of man, with no complaints
“Marco…”
“Da funk soul brother”
Living large and drama free
“Well, finally the ‘puppy’ is licking me for a change.”
Sleeping safe and sound, knowing the snoring is scaring away wild animals
Nature Boy and I chasing an ‘armadildo’ through the woods in the dark
Fire cooked meat with Vietnamese Chili Sauce
Roger’s clean parts
Getting out of my head
“She’s going to see her girlfriend. My puppy is a lesbian.”
The truly amazing night sky
“The big toe’s connected to the…penis?”
Rich, deep belly laughs
Riding in the back of the truck
“Earl who?”
Hearing insects instead of airconditioners
“Torso Hole”
Having our own Barrista
“Hey…Is that cock in the woods?”
Friends, funny tales and a campfire
“Spike!”
Knowing what shirt ‘rangutan would wear, days before the trip
Receiving a great compliment
Sleeping with “two chicks at the same time.”
“Hey, this is only 3 parts water, it’s missing one part.”
Late night and early morning chats with Nature Boy
“There was no spider, Hauself just wanted to rub your boob.”
Camping…on an air mattress
Slackker’s wild hair
“I’m a dirty, dirty, dirty whore.”
Roger belching my entire name
Blessed corn and potatoes to balance the buzz
Breast beer
Dogs gone wild
Realizing that hiking is finally fun again
DJ Pandora kickin’ it old school in ClubRav
Amazing cloud formations
Ipod
“Sucky, Sucky, Drinky, Drinky”
Being the loudest campers in the park
“Where are the Vegans?”
Feeling like a kid again
Late night with a group of quiet writers engaging in their craft around the fire
Pandora giggling and peeing on my tire
“5.0!!”
Roger’s crotch
Music with the right message at the right time
“Spike!”
Blyss’ dirty parts
Kitcar giggling
Diving in!
Nightly visits by the armadildo patrol
Walkie-talkies
Not caring what you look like…to the extreme
“The stupid leading the blind” (Marble and Dogbert tethered together)
Early morning watching the sunrise
“I’m a slut for free, but a whore for money”
Over-zealous nipples
Celebrating Blyss’ birthday in the woods
“There’s lesbians running wild on the mountain!”
“…Polo”
The view from the top
“You’re roasting … Oreos™?!? Puff, puff…Give.”
Drinking Natashas out of my wooden mug
“If I slap myself one more time, I’m gonna get turned on.”
Loving my weird, wild, wacky, wonderful friends
Planning to do it again
“Spike!”

The pictures are worth 1,000 words.

This doesn’t bode well:

But since Slackker couldn’t make the planning dinner last night I told him what he needed to bring, per our discussion. Our chat session went something like this:

hauself: your list
hauself: tent, starbucks coffee, your vegan food, your drinks, your stuff
hauself: we’ll have chips, cookies, some apples, and alot of meat
hauself: swim stuff
hauself: baby leash
hauself:
hauself: rain gear
hauself: fishing poles and tackle
hauself: laptop
hauself: hair dryer
hauself: medieval torches
hauself: gold boullion
hauself: acid
hauself: weight lifting belt
hauself: life-sized stuffed barney doll
hauself: circa ‘78 glow in the dark “kiss” poster w/blacklight
hauself: depends undergarments (for Rayrangutan)
hauself: and chapstick
hauself: that should be everything
hauself: we’ll get the rest
slackker: I was going to bring hot chicks but they weren’t on my list
hauself: that’s my responsibility
hauself: we couldn’t trust it to you
slackker: true

So, rain or shine we should be ready. Possum Kingdom here we come!

Have you ever noticed when you’re walking down a flight of stairs, if you think about it too much this uncomplicated task becomes challenging. The more you think about it, the more likely you are to trip and fall.

But, if you just boldly step off each step, look straight ahead and simply allow your foot to fearlessly hover in the air until it confidently finds the level step beneath it, then you have no problem at all. The less you Think about the stairs, the easier they are to conquer.

What if life is the same way?

Ps. Wooden soled clogs sound funny walking down an escalator. :satisfied: