As of today I am only responsible for ONE job position [and no, it is NOT missionary, or doggie-style]. The final hand-off in my recent job transition has been completed.

What a load off! Whew.

Holy cow! My MOTHER has a gmail account now.
What is this world coming to?!

(I love it.)

Glitterbug and I just returned from a much needed vacation to Hot Springs. Whenever you mention Hot Springs inevitably you will hear, ‘it’s nice….for Arkansas.”
I think that just about sums it up.

Our ‘agenda’ looked something like this:

Day One
Sleep in, Pamper, Eat, Shop, Nap, Light snack, Swim, Pamper, Rest, Cocktails, Wonderful dinner, Shop, Retire

Day Two
Wake, Snack, Pamper, Pamper, Eat, Pamper, Shop, Relax, Incredible meal, Relax, Retire

Day Three
Wake, Hike, Relax, Eat, Yoga/Qi Gong, Relax, Swim/Layout, Pamper, Fabulous dinner, Leave

It wasn’t all fun and games people! We had to deal with important dilemmas such as, “should I take a rinse off after my swim before I take my bath?” and “if we schedule these massages so close together will we still have enough time for a nap?”

…And I’m not even going to stress you out with details regarding the hectic menu options and food-to-stomach efficiency ratios that we had to deal with!

Lately I’ve been spending some of my day working/volunteering for some of our internal charitable campaigns. It’s a lot of fun and I get to carry balloons, generate enthusiasm, hand out cookies, play darts, and entice others to play darts (all of course tied in with collecting donations for fabulously worthy causes). Yes folks, I still get paid to do this and from my Strengths assessment, you can see that in many ways it’s a perfect fit for me.

So as I encouraged employees to enter our dart competition, one (unsurprising) phenomenon emerged…every employee who stood at the line and declared that they would lose…lost. Every one! And then at least 80% of those would turn, somewhat smugly, to look at me and say, “I told you” or “See, I knew it.” It made me wonder if people enjoy being right SO much, that they prefer it over winning?

Now this wasn’t ‘professional/competition level darts.’ The game was actually skewed to produce a large number of winners. It was a ‘feel good’ activity, not a true test of skill or aptitude. Of the winners some had high expectations, anticipated a win or strong showing, or at least stood at the line with an open outlook. It was members of this group who walked away at the end of the day with a prize.

It reminded me of going to gamble with Sparkler, she frequently walks out with more money than she walked in with …she just simply wouldn’t have it any other way.

(As for me …I tend to get really great parking almost anywhere, anytime.)

In the game of life, if you KNOW you can’t win, at least you get to walk away with the consolation prize of being RIGHT!

I consider myself very fortunate. So many times people have to deal with back-biting and underhandedness at work. Whereas I have recently had several instances where co-workers and/or superiors have taken a moment to compliment my efforts upwards and in writing. I am so flattered by their words and sentiments.

On an unrelated side note:
One of my co-workers was once a fellow ‘shot-put’ competitor (and even a fellow state-ranked putter at that).
We are a proud and rare breed and it is always fun to find one another.

After Roger’s fabulous White Trash Party on Saturday night Glitterbug, Betty Boop and I decided to stop by the Double Wide for a nite-cap. It only seemed appropriate, given our trashy costumes and all.

Whether you are in your black-tie best or your trailer park worst, few things are more fun than being the only ones dressed up for a night on the town. (Sure, everyone is dressed for a wedding or Halloween, so that’s not the same.)

Most people just don’t know what to do when the ‘unusual’ collides with the ‘normal.’ Typically they avert their eyes, giggle to themselves and/or whisper behind secretive hands. Occasionally you will get the brave few who actually chose to engage. Some are curious, some get the joke and play along (these are my favorites) and some are just mistaken altogether but are valiant in their attempt to logically place the misfit pieces into a smaller reality puzzle.

That’s the way I chose to explain why “John” mistook me for a drag queen. But in all honesty….can you blame him? Only a drag queen would run around looking THAT trashy.

Frankly, I consider it a trashy-fashion coup!

So here is my response to the fun new meme.

Directions: Type “(your name) is” with the quotes, into a Google search then pick out your favorite 10 responses.
(I’m cheating and posting more than 10):

Hauself is singing “do you know the way to san Jose.”
Hauself is bold, to say the least.
Hauself is available for inspirational talks at your function.
Hauself is the polar opposite of Guido’s wife.
Hauself is just the thing for you.
Hauself is NOT the typical person.
Hauself is a celebration of the feminine.
Hauself is a really handsome woman. Her beauty is beyond human reach.
Hauself is determined to find her own place.
Hauself is not the only claimed psychic that fucks with gullible peoples mind.
Hauself is a riot of laughs from start to finish.
Hauself is off down-canyon napping and staying warm in the bright sun.
Hauself is strong-minded and honest, as determined as a tank.
Hauself is doing something no one has ever done before. … Hauself is a pioneer.
Hauself is a fraud on so many levels; it’s hard to know where to begin.

I typically don’t watch very much T.V. so I was amused the other morning when I woke from my dreams and recalled a rather vivid ‘episode’ of this crazy new sitcom called “Changing Faces”. It starred Ralph Maccio (with a rather intensely receding hairline) and Scott Baio as gay lovers living in some mid-income borough in New York. Mackenzie Philips was their quirky, jaded and single Lesbian neighbor who lived upstairs and provided “wise” relationship council, while Kim Fields was their wise-cracking Heterosexual ‘fag-hag’ friend, who constantly regaled them with tales from her sad and sordid dating life as they all sat around and jokingly disparaged “men!” (Humpfff!) [Sideways glance at the camera…queue laugh track…] You get the picture.

Anyway, I guess my sleeping brain thought all these out of work 80’s actors needed something to do. Now if only I could consistently ‘dream’ up a script.

Sad truth is….it would probably sell!